THIS FORM OF MEDITATION CONDITIONS HAPPINESS, PEACE, LOVE, AND MEDITATION WITHIN.
It also trains the mind to easily reach a state of loving-kindness and compassion for all creatures, including yourself.
These basic phrases underpins the practice:
May all creatures be free of pain.
May there be no ill will among all creatures.
May all creatures be imbued with compassion and love.
May all creatures experience true happiness.
Loving Kindness meditation is divided into three sections.
To begin, you must mentally create these emotions as intensely as possible.
- Make the greatest effort you can, since this one portion determines the outcome of the whole exercise.
- It gets simpler to create these emotions the more you nurture them.
The second step is to create a strong desire for others to feel the same way you do.
- This will take up the most of your practice time and will include many visualizations.
- Begin by picturing the people and things for whom you have the greatest appreciation and affection.
- Then go on to individuals you don't know as well, then neutral people, and finally total strangers.
- Then there are the individuals you hate or have problems with.
Finally, broaden this desire to encompass all living things everywhere.
- Finally, remind yourself that you, too, need and deserve to feel comfortable, at ease, full with love, and joyful.
- Don't undervalue the significance of this; despite our proclivity for selfishness, we find it the most difficult of all people to genuinely love.
THE PRACTICE
Set a timer for your meditation—say, 30 minutes to an hour—but feel free to modify it as needed.
Begin your meditation by following the four-step transition to the breath at the nose, counting ten breaths, and then tracking the breath until your mind is calm.
1. GENERATION OF INATE FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS.
- Allow the breath sensations to fade into the background of awareness until you are fully present with a calm, clear mind and well-focused attention.
- They should stay in place for the length of your sit, which will help you maintain your focus.
- May I be free of pain.
- Bring to mind, as vividly as possible, what it's like to be totally free of any sort of mental or bodily pain.
- Make a list of the ways you are now suffering-free.
- Reminisce over days when life was simpler and more comfortable.
- Make up your own story.
- Do whatever it takes to get a clear, powerful feeling of what it's like to be pain-free, fully relaxed, and at peace in both mind and body.
Then, without sacrificing your sense of ease and contentment, express the following wish:
- May I be free of malice.
- Bring to mind, as vividly as possible, what it's like to be totally free of all malice and at peace with everything and everyone.
- Pay attention to the calm you're experiencing right now.
- Remember, visualize, or do anything else you can to create a clear, powerful sense of being free of ill-will, with no residue of hatred, wrath, or resentment in your heart, as you did previously.
- Feel totally at ease with your surroundings.
Make the wish:
- May I be filled with loving-kindness, without losing these sensations of comfort and serenity.
- Bring to mind, as vividly as possible, what it feels like to be overwhelmed with beautiful, heartfelt emotions of love and compassion.
- Consider someone you care about and the feelings of tenderness and compassion that they evoke in you.
- Remember, visualize, or do whatever you can to create a clear, powerful sense of loving-kindness and profound care, just like you did previously.
Make the wish:
- May I be really happy, without losing these emotions of comfort, serenity, and love.
- Bring to mind, as vividly as possible, what it feels like to be really happy, satisfied, wanting and needing nothing, soaked with the sheer joy of being alive.
- Make a mental note of how happy you are right now.
- Remember, fantasize, or do anything else that helps trigger happy emotions, like previously.
- Sit for a few moments, soaking in the sensation of being free of sorrow, at peace, and overflowing with love and pleasure.
2. GENERATING WISHES FOR OTHERS.
Say to yourself,
- "Just as I want to be free from suffering, free from ill-will, filled with loving-kindness, and genuinely joyful, so do all creatures wish for these things."
Consider someone you really care for and have positive emotions for, someone who has aided and soothed you in some manner.
Make the following wish while picturing this person as vividly as you can, wherever you believe they may be at this time, doing whatever they could be doing:
- May (name) be liberated from pain.
- May (name) be free of any malice.
- May (name) be surrounded by love and compassion.
- May (name) experience true happiness.
Send these emotions from your heart to theirs, from your thoughts to theirs, as you do so.
- Imagine this person's face as they experience a feeling of ease and comfort, peace and goodwill, lovingkindness, and genuine pleasure that appears out of nowhere.
- When you've done with this individual, choose another person you care about and do the same for him or her.
You may choose as many individuals as you want.
If the emotions you've worked so hard to develop start to dissipate, take a few minutes to strengthen them again.
When you're ready, consider individuals with whom you aren't as close and for whom you have less love.
- These individuals may be coworkers, neighbors, or casual acquaintances.
- Select one of them and envision where they are and what they are doing.
- Repeat the process of making the wish, sending your good emotions to them as a gift, and visualizing the look on their face when they become aware of those feelings when you can image them in your mind.
- Do it once or as many times as you'd want with as many different individuals as you'd like.
- Take the time to renew your emotions of comfort, serenity, love, and satisfied satisfaction if they diminish.
When you're ready, consider individuals you come across on a regular basis but don't know well, such as cashiers, waiters, or school crossing guards.
- Pick one and dedicate the loving-kindness practice to them.
- You can do this with as many people as you want.
- When you're ready, consider individuals with whom you've had problems or whom you hate.
- It may help to remember yourself that they, like you and everyone else, are susceptible to all kinds of pain.
Remember that whatever animosity you have against them causes you to suffer, depriving you of serenity and happiness.
Similarly, whatever animosity they have against you simply contributes to their own suffering.
- Whatever love they feel and whatever genuine pleasure they have can only benefit others around them.
- It may be difficult to practice loving-kindness with someone you hate, so start with someone you don't have strong emotions towards or with whom you have just had a dispute.
- Imagine him or her in your thoughts, make the wish, give them your good vibes, and watch as they are affected by your good vibes.
Carry out this exercise with as many tough individuals as you feel comfortable with.
Never forget to replenish your emotions of comfort, serenity, love, and satisfied contentment whenever they begin to diminish.
- It is just not effective practice to go through the motions without having these emotions in your heart.
- You may need to practice loving-kindness for weeks or even months before you're ready to deal with the most challenging individuals in your life, but that's the objective.
- It's essential not to hurry, but you should ultimately build up to those you despise the most—your greatest adversaries, people who have wronged you in ways you haven't yet been able to forgive.
When you've gone as far as you can with tough individuals during a session, go on to big groups of people.
- Consider the people who reside in your immediate vicinity.
- Create a wish for them.
- Send your best wishes to them.
- Imagine your whole neighborhood being filled with joy, love, serenity, and comfort at the same time.
- These priceless emotions are endless in your heart.
- They grow more powerful the more you send them out.
- Consider your whole city and do the same.
- Rep with the rest of your country.
- Then go to everyone on the globe, and finally to every sentient creature.
Finish by making the wish and giving these similar good emotions to every living thing in the cosmos.
3. DIRECTING THE WISH TOWARDS YOURSELF.
Now, focus all of your emotions on yourself.
Remind yourself that you, like everyone else, are deserving of peace, love, and happiness.
The most direct route to loving and accepting others is to love and accept yourself—with all your flaws and faults.
Say to yourself,
- May I continue to be free of pain since I am no less worthy than anybody else.
- May I be free of malice for the rest of my life.
- May I be filled with loving-kindness in the future.
- May I be genuinely happy for the rest of my life.
Finish by expressing a strong desire for these emotions to persist, and resolving to behave in a manner that allows this to happen.
Make it your mission to embody these priceless mental traits so that you may share them with others.
Commit to utilizing this meditation as a model for loving-kindness practice in your everyday life.
ONE LAST THOUGHT.
People often oppose to this technique because they believe it is artificial.
Please don't pass judgment until you've given it a go.
This is one of the most effective meditation techniques for changing the way your mind functions.
You don't have to think that the loving-kindness emotions you put out have any tangible impact on others, but it helps.
The idea is that we all have limitless reserves of patience, forgiveness, compassion, love, and happiness.
This exercise teaches the mind and heart to access those resources more readily, while also providing a sense of pleasure and delight.
You may also want to read more about Mindfulness Meditation here.